This was the post I planned to submit for Valentine’s Day, but forgot to click the Publish button. Ooops. Better late than never.
With Valentine’s Day just a few days away, I thought I’d share a love story.
Once upon a time, on a cold winter’s day, a third of an inch of snow blanketed the land. Amidst the wintery mix Charlotte shutdown, and the lovely forty-something maiden and her knight made good use of the two-hour work delay.
Energized, Sir Scott braved the elements to go to the grocery store to buy a zucchini for his lovely bride’s breakfast. Despite her protest, he insisted she stay warm and toasty in bed.
He returned bearing gifts of sweet treats, crunchy snacks and fruit juice for the kids—who’d scored a snow day from the almost half inch of snow that made the roads too treacherous for travel—along with the requested zucchini for his beloved.
Big red hearts formed in her eyes for her gallant hero. However, happily-ever-after was short-lived.
The black knight rode off to slay dragons, leaving the maiden to unpack the bounty on ye old kitchen counter. But instead of the zucchini she’d requested—and he insisted on getting—she held an English cucumber in her hand. Heart-shaped eyes and that loving feeling vanished and in their place appeared Bluto, with gritted teeth and steam shooting out of her ears.
So much for warm and toasty.
The enraged maiden snatched the phone off the hook to fuss at the knight and let him know he’d gotten the wrong thing, but changed her mind.
“I should’ve gone myself,” she said as she yanked off the royal Granny nightie, and yanked on a long sleeve t-shirt and sweatpants—all the while grumbling to herself.
When she stepped outside, one of the peasants yelled from across the way, “Hey, you look like Mrs. Santa Claus.”
“Did that BEEP just call me fat?”she asked herself. Fortunately, she gazed down upon herself, realized she had on a red coat, a white scarf, gloves and hat—perfect Mrs. Claus attire. She bestowed a gracious wave, instead of blasting her loyal subject with a royal cuss out. The unsuspecting woman kept her head for another day.
At the village grocer, she explained to the court CSR manager what happened and he laughed. “You can’t fault the man for trying. Cut the brother some slack,” he said.
And he was right.
The knight, with all his gifts and qualities, rarely vetured into any store. All he knew was that a zucchini was a green stick, and he chose the biggest green stick he could find because he loved the fair maiden and wanted to make her happy.
Maybe she should have been more specific with her request and said, “Zucchini’s not wrapped in plastic.”
By the time she returned to Chateau Gaskins, her mad was replaced with gratitude for a wonderful knight who’d gone out of his way in nineteen degree weather to do something nice for her so she could stay warm inside.
Alas, she will probably be blinded by red hearts in her eyes again and send her black knight to the store for a bag of baby carrots only to have him return with a big bag of cheese curls—which they’ll enjoy in bed while watching one of her favorite movies, starring Sir Gerard Butler, that he would’ve picked up at the Merry Ole Red Box on his way out of the store.
Moral of the story: Sometimes it’s just better to be happy than right. And cut the brother some slack.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
Carb Buster Breakfast, adapted from Ree Drummond
1 tablespoon unsalted butter
1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil
1/2 medium zucchini, cut into 1/2-inch chunks
1/2 medium yellow squash, cut into 1/2-inch chunks
1/2 medium red onion, cut Into Chunks
Coarse ground black pepper
1 Roma tomato, cut into chunks
2 large eggs
1 teaspoon white vinegar
1 slice cheese (I like pepper Jack and havarti)
Melt the butter and oil in a medium non-stick skillet over medium-high heat. Add the onions and cook until tender, about 3 minutes. Add the zucchini and squash, sprinkle with salt and pepper, and cook for 4 minutes, stirring frequently. Add the tomato and cook 2 additional minutes. Remove the vegetables from the heat and keep warm.
Bring a medium saucepan of water to a gentle boil over medium-low heat in a medium skillet. Add the vinegar. Crack one egg into a small bowl. Use a wooden spoon to carefully stir the water into a circular “whirlpool.” Add the egg to the water. Allow it to swirl around until set, about 3 minute.
Use a slotted spoon to remove the egg from the water and set it on a plate. Repeat with the other egg.
Spoon the vegetables in a bowl and top with cheese. Place the eggs on top.
Sprinkle the eggs with salt and pepper and serve!